Swordfights and Screaming Matches

Our rescue cat has an obsession with peeing at the bottom of the stairs by the front door. (We live in a first floor flat so it’s dark and damp there with one way in and out) We have tried everything-from newspaper and plastic bags (cats aren’t supposed to like the feel) to enzymatic cleaners to shift her scent. We thought we’d cracked it last week with a stairgate blocking her access, until Cat realised she can squeeze through the bars. Our victory dance was curtailed as we tried to find yet another solution. We chopped up the box the gate came in (“told you it might come in useful” crowed Husband) and weaved it through the bars of the gate with a big overhang at each end where the big gaps are.

“Wouldn’t it just be easier to feed Cat until she gets too fat to fit” asked husband. I had to explain that animals do not gain weight like Princess Mummy after a fourth slice of chocolate cake.

Anyway, the point of the story is that there were lots of cardboard strips left from the box cutting and so we did what every self respecting individual does when faced with tidying up to do - we started a sword fight. Princess Mummy started very strongly with two “swords,” but it all went downhill as Husband acted the most dramatic death scenes since Hamlet and Son took advantage of my hysteria to “stab” me with his “dagger.” Then it all ended like Hamlet with Princess Mummy and Husband dead on the floor and Son couldn’t be left out. I suspect there might be a career in acting for him as he’s never actually seen a person die, even on TV, and yet was better than PM and Husband put together.

And Cat can no longer fit through the bars of the gate and sits next to her litter box glaring balefully as we pass.  So we can do the happy dance again!

NB-Cat has been checked by the vet and there is no reason she can't use the litter box, she'd just rather not!