I'm Baaaa-aack!
Finally life has settled down at the castle, and I'm taking the chance to reconnect with the outside world.
The last year has been hard. And I don't just mean "having a baby" hard. I mean - having a Lactose Intolerant baby and an older child being diagnosed with behavioural problems and a recurrence of Cataplexies and redefining our roles in a marriage - hard.
So I could do the world's longest Blog post about my year - in which case we'd all be asleep - or take a leaf out of the "surviving having a child with ADHD" books and address things as they come up. Guess which one I'm going for?
So for now I'll leave you with a snapshot of my week as told to The Coven. (A group of the closest, most supportive friends in the world)
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I'm so ashamed. We've got on bus on way home from The Big City and I put my hand into Little Thug's pram. There's 4 things in there that we haven't paid for!!! Oh the shame!
And they're all from different shops. Prince Daddy's been giving him stuff to keep him quiet and they've ended up in the footmuff by his feet! I've never stolen in my life before! I said I'd call the shops and pay for em but Prince Daddy reckons not to bother.
I'm mortified! Feel like bloody Fagin taking the stolen goods off the kids!
3 HOURS LATER....
So I phoned the £shop earlier to pay for Little Thug's stolen cap. It wasn't a great success.
The man laughed at me. So I told him I wasn't gonna pay after all but he could reduce his stock by 1 Mickey Mouse cap!
Then he got nasty and went from laughing at me for phoning to pay £1 to saying he'd call the police and have me traced by my phone number.
So I told him I was glad I'd thought to withold my number and hung up. Then shat myself for the next 2 hours til common sense kicked in.
I didn't even bother with calling Pxxxx, Wxxxx or the other £ shop. So today we "stole" a Mickey Mouse cap, Mickey Mouse sunglasses, a toddlers drinking cup and a packet of origami paper!
Then he got nasty and went from laughing at me for phoning to pay £1 to saying he'd call the police and have me traced by my phone number.
So I told him I was glad I'd thought to withold my number and hung up. Then shat myself for the next 2 hours til common sense kicked in.
I didn't even bother with calling Pxxxx, Wxxxx or the other £ shop. So today we "stole" a Mickey Mouse cap, Mickey Mouse sunglasses, a toddlers drinking cup and a packet of origami paper!
24 HOURS LATER AFTER LOTS OF QUERIES ABOUT HOW I AM...
I'm ok now. With our grand shoplifting spree of......£3.75
I'm starting to see the funny side now. Prince Daddy was cracking up when I was sitting in Wxxxx Café telling the bloke that I wasn't paying him his pound cos he was rude and anyway I'd just spent it on coffee.
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The whole experience was mortifying and not one to be repeated. And ultimately cost more than the value of the goods we "stole" as I made a £10 donation to the NSPCC in Little Thug's name to appease my conscience. But on the flip side, at least I've had a half interesting story to tell you all.
